Overwhelmed? Ask yourself this question

Ever have one of those days when you don’t know where to start, when you feel overwhelmed, when you ask yourself, what should I DO today?

Luna under blankets 900 x 600

There are so many conflicting priorities and you just wish a big, fat genie would hand you the answer. Or do it all for you.

I woke up that way the other day. But when I asked myself what I should do I felt worse — more unfocused and overwhelmed than ever.

So, I started asking myself what I really wanted to do instead.

That’s when the magic happened.

The answer was writing a blog post about how women should never let themselves be limited by age, labels or society’s expectations.

Writing it allowed me to share something I feel passionate about. And that meant I was being fully myself as I wrote. It was what I wanted to do.

After I finished the post, I was energized and much more productive for the rest of the day. I even got some of those “shoulds” accomplished because I was feeling strong, centred and positive.

What do you really want to do today?

If you are feeling overwhelmed ask yourself this question: What do I really want to do? What do I want to do right now? What would make me feel good?

If you can’t act on your answer right away, make note of it and do so the next opportunity you get. Even better, create that opportunity by scheduling some ‘me’ time into your day.

Your answer may be nudging you towards taking a risk — changing jobs, ending a relationship or moving in a direction that you’re not sure about.

Or it may just be reminding you that you need to write a blog post.

Go where your answer takes you

If your answer makes you uncomfortable don’t come up with a million reasons why it won’t work. If you do, you will just stifle yourself and feel even worse.

See where your answer leads, instead. It will help bring you clarity and probably improve your mood.

Call to Action

Whenever you get sidetracked by obligations your heart just isn’t in, ask yourself this question because none of us has time to waste.

Why spend today doing something that doesn’t serve you?

Make 2014 the year you finally own it – who you are, what you are good at, what you want to do, what you don’t want to do, what makes you feel good and what you want to contribute.

You have a lot to offer and it’s time the world knew it!

c 2016 by Kathy Barthel

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Blogs for women 40+ need more sex, fewer labels

I was trying to expand my blogging community recently so I went looking for blogging sites for women over 40. But I kept running into online communities that were downright depressing.

I came across one blog where the locals were discussing their preference for being addressed by age-defining labels such as “ma’am” while eating in restaurants.

One participant noted that this was the “polite” term for a grown-up female.

I’m just Kathy

If that’s polite, give me rude any day. I’m nobody’s ma’am; I’m just Kathy, always have been, always will be. Even when I’m 90.

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I know, unless a server is writing “Kathy” on my coffee cup at Starbucks, he or she is unlikely to know that.

If anything, I’d rather be called, “hon” by a certain male voice. That pretty much undoes me but being labeled based on some linear, age continuum before I can order my lunch, not so much.

Respect is just — respect

I don’t need a gender-specific, age-defining label to know that my server is treating me with respect.

A polite, “What would you like to order?” with some direct eye contact, will do.

I’d rather talk about sex

The other thing I noticed about some of these blogging sites for women 40+ was that they didn’t talk much about sex and how awesome it can be.

There was lots of information about nasty medical issues related to it but not much about the fun stuff.

Many women over 40 are having the greatest sex of their lives and trust me, they’re good at it. 

I’d rather talk about that — and be called “hon” by someone who could serve me lunch anytime…

c 2016 Kathy Barthel